And not in a Utah if/then sort of scenario. Though the looming Cincinnati-Pittsburgh matchup does bear watching. Put it this way, here's what we know.
1) The computer algorithims are flawed. Texas should not leapfrog TCU by beating Baylor when a ranked TCU beats Utah.
2) The winner of the SEC looks like a lock for one half-of the BCS.
3) The Big 12 Championship game is a 50-50 propisition for entry into the BCS title game.
Now, I know what you're saying. Either they win or they lose, right? it's a 50-50 shot. But here's the deal. There have been 13 games in the history of the Big 12 championship. 10 have had a team either ranked first or second, or with circumstances earlier in the day leading to a win and they're in scenario.
5 teams lost. Now, I grant the premise that Missouri losing in 2007 was not exactly an upset. They played and lost to Oklahoma earlier in the year, after all. But in 1996? Nebraska lost a chance at the Bowl Alliance Championship Series because James Brown was a man on fire. Kansas State has experienced both sides of the coin. Michael Bishop got shocked. And they beat the Heisman trophy winner in 2003.
And Mack Brown has been shocked before by a highly motivated BCS North team that finished strong. Gary Barnett had a National Championship Caliber team for the right two weeks in 2001. And the Longhorns? Don't exactly have the strongest record in the title games.
If Wyoming doesn't shock TCU this week? There's going to be a world changing BCS event. Or a 1 in 3 chance, anyway.
Showing posts with label Fantastical Football. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Fantastical Football. Show all posts
Monday, November 16, 2009
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
Dear Ted Thompson...
For crap fucking sake, you're doing it wrong.
Ahman Green was done before he left the last time. I know he's a high character guy, and he can still passblock. But he's done. Injury prone. Much worse than Grant running the ball.
And yet? Sold!
Here's the thing, when you have a running back? You have a career that is short and cold. And when you have a running back, the difference between a young street free agent and a good runner is miniscule. Remember when Samkon Gado brought the thunder after Ahman went out for the year? These things happen every season.
But instead of taking a flyer on a Lex Hilliard or a Javarris Williams? They go back to the dry well. Running backs don't get their groove back once it's gone. And this is just a desperation play. Flat out, pure and simple.
In conclusion, goddamnit.
Love,
The Grand National Championships
Ahman Green was done before he left the last time. I know he's a high character guy, and he can still passblock. But he's done. Injury prone. Much worse than Grant running the ball.
And yet? Sold!
Here's the thing, when you have a running back? You have a career that is short and cold. And when you have a running back, the difference between a young street free agent and a good runner is miniscule. Remember when Samkon Gado brought the thunder after Ahman went out for the year? These things happen every season.
But instead of taking a flyer on a Lex Hilliard or a Javarris Williams? They go back to the dry well. Running backs don't get their groove back once it's gone. And this is just a desperation play. Flat out, pure and simple.
In conclusion, goddamnit.
Love,
The Grand National Championships
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
A salute to Mike Sims Walker.
I am a Mike Sims-Walker owner. I have him on five of my teams in this fantasy football problem of mine. I started him four times last week. Suffice it to say, if I ever see Jack Del Rio? He will be getting an MMA knee strike or two in the equalizers before I run away.
But this makes me thrilled to the gills.
See, Mike Sims-Walker had a decision to make. Either he goes home and goes to bed. Or he goes and gets sex. Sex won. Sex always wins. Unless you're so far gone about your local sports team that you live like a monk.
But then you have to remember something. MSW is a Jaguar. They don't really have local sports fans. So considering that he didn't completely screw me over.
I salute you.
And I salute all who are getting it. As I am not. That is why I do thses things.
But this makes me thrilled to the gills.
Everyone wants to know why Jaguars receiver Mike Sims-Walker was deactivated for Sunday’s 41-0 blowout at Seattle.
Well, the answer is simpler than you think.
Sims-Walker missed bed check Friday night due to a late-night rendezvous with a lady friend, according to an NFL source, who described the situaton by saying, "undefeated and untied."
There guys, mystery solved.
See, Mike Sims-Walker had a decision to make. Either he goes home and goes to bed. Or he goes and gets sex. Sex won. Sex always wins. Unless you're so far gone about your local sports team that you live like a monk.
But then you have to remember something. MSW is a Jaguar. They don't really have local sports fans. So considering that he didn't completely screw me over.
I salute you.
And I salute all who are getting it. As I am not. That is why I do thses things.
Sunday, October 4, 2009
Ten Fantasy Football Thoughts...
No need for an introduction, this post will be what you think it is.
10. If you can find an upgrade, and catches aren't a factor in your league? I would consider cutting bait on Leon Washington. Now, the odds on a real upgrade are longish. But if you're looking at a Jerome Harrison? I would go as far as cutting the guy who lost run to Shonn Greene.
9. Ronnie Brown is someone who you can find a way to get interested in. In the next 4 weeks? It's the Jets twice, the Saints and a bye. After that? It's mostly cake.
8. You can't cut Romo, but the guy does not have clutch decision making skills. If you have a backup in the David Garrard phylum? You have to call him your QB1.
7. Easy way to a defense by comittee? Whoever plays the Rams and or Browns.
6. Or the Raiders. (By the by? Drop all Raiders.)
5. I would wait one more week before I decided to roll out onto the Mo Massaquoi train. Unless your scenario is a desperate one. Your hitched your wagon to Laurent Robinson? Make a run for Massaquoi.
4. Don't make a move for Rashard Mendenhall until he shows this type of running versus a team with a real run defense. Please be patient.
3. Vernon Davis is having a breakout. Huh. Who saw it coming?
2. If you have the space? Pick up Matt Leinart. If you don't? Wait for a time when you need only one quarterback.
1. If Ricky Williams is available? I would pick him up. I expect you would find both Brown and Rilliams get 20 or so touches until Henne gets some semblance of a groove. Which won't happen.
10. If you can find an upgrade, and catches aren't a factor in your league? I would consider cutting bait on Leon Washington. Now, the odds on a real upgrade are longish. But if you're looking at a Jerome Harrison? I would go as far as cutting the guy who lost run to Shonn Greene.
9. Ronnie Brown is someone who you can find a way to get interested in. In the next 4 weeks? It's the Jets twice, the Saints and a bye. After that? It's mostly cake.
8. You can't cut Romo, but the guy does not have clutch decision making skills. If you have a backup in the David Garrard phylum? You have to call him your QB1.
7. Easy way to a defense by comittee? Whoever plays the Rams and or Browns.
6. Or the Raiders. (By the by? Drop all Raiders.)
5. I would wait one more week before I decided to roll out onto the Mo Massaquoi train. Unless your scenario is a desperate one. Your hitched your wagon to Laurent Robinson? Make a run for Massaquoi.
4. Don't make a move for Rashard Mendenhall until he shows this type of running versus a team with a real run defense. Please be patient.
3. Vernon Davis is having a breakout. Huh. Who saw it coming?
2. If you have the space? Pick up Matt Leinart. If you don't? Wait for a time when you need only one quarterback.
1. If Ricky Williams is available? I would pick him up. I expect you would find both Brown and Rilliams get 20 or so touches until Henne gets some semblance of a groove. Which won't happen.
Saturday, October 3, 2009
The Seven things I learned from this week in college football.
Introduction in regards to the craziness of this season. Mention of how a rival with an inferior record beats an unbeaten and resurgent rival. Jonathan Crompton joke. Oh hey, next week has a real big game yeah?
Line break to artificially pad post size.
7. Notre Dame has returmed to being a legitimate heel team. Not in the multiple championships sort of way. But in the oversell for an undertalented team and only find a way to win via hitting a nutshot sort of way. Kyle McCarthy saved the game by destroying D'Andre Goodman Chuck Cecil-style. Washington deserved better.
6. That being said? Golden Tate is going to be a stud professional receiver. Great pros straddle the line between insufferable and awesome. Golden Tate is already there.
5. Why didn't anybody tell us that Houston can't stop the run? It's not as if they had an inexperienced defensive line that was like 91st in rush defense last season. Oh. Yeah. They did. Donald Buckram looked like Barry Sanders tonight.
An aside: I would still bless the Case Keenum as Heisman candidate meme. This loss was in no way his fault.
Aside Number 2: BYU will never...EEEEEEEVER...be mentioned as a national championship contender A-GAIN.
4. There will be no legitimate case for a BCS buster this year. I'm calling Boise State losing to Tulsa. And TCU is going to lose.
3. Iowa and Wisconsin may be the marquee match-up of the Big 10 conference. I mean, if Wisconsin can win the checkers game versus Ohio State and if Iowa can have the greatest hot start in history.
2. There is a ridiculous amount of unbeaten and unranked big schools. Three teams are 5-0 and unranked. One isn't going to make the top 25.
1. Who's leading the MAC East? Temple. My call of them being this year's Buffalo is back!
Line break to artificially pad post size.
7. Notre Dame has returmed to being a legitimate heel team. Not in the multiple championships sort of way. But in the oversell for an undertalented team and only find a way to win via hitting a nutshot sort of way. Kyle McCarthy saved the game by destroying D'Andre Goodman Chuck Cecil-style. Washington deserved better.
6. That being said? Golden Tate is going to be a stud professional receiver. Great pros straddle the line between insufferable and awesome. Golden Tate is already there.
5. Why didn't anybody tell us that Houston can't stop the run? It's not as if they had an inexperienced defensive line that was like 91st in rush defense last season. Oh. Yeah. They did. Donald Buckram looked like Barry Sanders tonight.
An aside: I would still bless the Case Keenum as Heisman candidate meme. This loss was in no way his fault.
Aside Number 2: BYU will never...EEEEEEEVER...be mentioned as a national championship contender A-GAIN.
4. There will be no legitimate case for a BCS buster this year. I'm calling Boise State losing to Tulsa. And TCU is going to lose.
3. Iowa and Wisconsin may be the marquee match-up of the Big 10 conference. I mean, if Wisconsin can win the checkers game versus Ohio State and if Iowa can have the greatest hot start in history.
2. There is a ridiculous amount of unbeaten and unranked big schools. Three teams are 5-0 and unranked. One isn't going to make the top 25.
1. Who's leading the MAC East? Temple. My call of them being this year's Buffalo is back!
Monday, September 28, 2009
10 NFL Notes/Reactions/Twitter-size Rambles.
You know how this makes me feel? I'm really someone who likes to keep the original content going. I don't want to use numbers as a prompt for my post. But since I want to provide content, here we go.
10. I'm excited that Josh Johnson is getting run as a starting quarterback. He's a dynamic force who has been hyperproductive in the lower level. That being said? Washington and Philadeplhia are going to be real challenges for Johnson straight away. It does get easier in the second half.
9. With Laurent Robinson being out for the season, the Rams look like they are going to be a serious threat for 0-16. But I could see a scenario where they make a post bye week dead cat bounce.
8. I am still going to hang on to Chaz Schilens for one more week. You can replace all Raiders not named Darren McFadden if you want. Depending on the activity of your waiver wire, Zach Miller falls into the droppable list. But 8 out of 10 situations you need to hang on.
7. Obvious waiver wire pick-up for a Laurent Robinson owner? Pierre Garcon.
6. The running back I would trade for? Marshawn Lynch. A bad team's RB1 who gets the majority of carries a.k.a. Darren McFadden? That would be my trade. Why? While Fred Jackson will get a Reggie Bush sort of run, Marshawn will get 200 carries and all the goal line stuff.
5. If Ted Ginn struggles the rest of the way? We can write him off.
4. The best fantasy football plug-in running back for the next two weeks? Glen Coffee. Start your puns...now!
3. Chris Henry has been lost in the shuffle. The only way he's currently playable is in a TD-only league when you're hurting. Drop him everywhere else for now.
2. The sleeper of 2009? The Bengals. Seriously.
1. One of the rare Fantasy Football games I really want is happening next week. Hef is the proprietor of Major League Jerk. You have seem me with caps locked text in his general direction on several occasions via the the twitter. I play him this week. I'm a 65 point underdog. I want the single greatest upset in the Twitter based sportsblog action league history.
I need this.
10. I'm excited that Josh Johnson is getting run as a starting quarterback. He's a dynamic force who has been hyperproductive in the lower level. That being said? Washington and Philadeplhia are going to be real challenges for Johnson straight away. It does get easier in the second half.
9. With Laurent Robinson being out for the season, the Rams look like they are going to be a serious threat for 0-16. But I could see a scenario where they make a post bye week dead cat bounce.
8. I am still going to hang on to Chaz Schilens for one more week. You can replace all Raiders not named Darren McFadden if you want. Depending on the activity of your waiver wire, Zach Miller falls into the droppable list. But 8 out of 10 situations you need to hang on.
7. Obvious waiver wire pick-up for a Laurent Robinson owner? Pierre Garcon.
6. The running back I would trade for? Marshawn Lynch. A bad team's RB1 who gets the majority of carries a.k.a. Darren McFadden? That would be my trade. Why? While Fred Jackson will get a Reggie Bush sort of run, Marshawn will get 200 carries and all the goal line stuff.
5. If Ted Ginn struggles the rest of the way? We can write him off.
4. The best fantasy football plug-in running back for the next two weeks? Glen Coffee. Start your puns...now!
3. Chris Henry has been lost in the shuffle. The only way he's currently playable is in a TD-only league when you're hurting. Drop him everywhere else for now.
2. The sleeper of 2009? The Bengals. Seriously.
1. One of the rare Fantasy Football games I really want is happening next week. Hef is the proprietor of Major League Jerk. You have seem me with caps locked text in his general direction on several occasions via the the twitter. I play him this week. I'm a 65 point underdog. I want the single greatest upset in the Twitter based sportsblog action league history.
I need this.
Sunday, September 27, 2009
RapidDraft: The worst Fantasy Football Site Ever.
Not to say that it's not an intriguing concept. You take ten media based fantasy sports experts and last years champion. You have a speed draft. And you. You pick the spot. And it should be fun, right?
Well, I got a free entry. So I thought to myself. Sure. Spin the wheel and make the deal. And even with a free entry?
It's godawful.
It's godawful for three reasons. It's godawful because when you consider the fact that a text based search box has been in every website's interface since the days when Ray Lucas was a worthwhile waiver wire pick-up. But it's not here. So if you wanted to draft Ray Rice, you would have to scroll up and down to get him.
Also? For waiver purposes? Other sites have their own problems, but with no text box and sorting people by first name? That's indefensible. That shows that someone illogical was running the web interface.
And you know the third problem? It stems from Domenik Hixon. Amidst the emergence of Mario Manningham and Steve Smith was the disappearance of the mid-July sleeper. In fact? He was on the inactive list this week.
And in this expert league, this league that's supposed to simulate the best of the best? I played a team that started Domenik Hixon. It's something that's not supposed to happen unless it's a Random Yahoo gathering, right?
But in this "Play against the best league," I got to play a man up. I joined this league to avoid that.
C'est la vie.
Well, I got a free entry. So I thought to myself. Sure. Spin the wheel and make the deal. And even with a free entry?
It's godawful.
It's godawful for three reasons. It's godawful because when you consider the fact that a text based search box has been in every website's interface since the days when Ray Lucas was a worthwhile waiver wire pick-up. But it's not here. So if you wanted to draft Ray Rice, you would have to scroll up and down to get him.
Also? For waiver purposes? Other sites have their own problems, but with no text box and sorting people by first name? That's indefensible. That shows that someone illogical was running the web interface.
And you know the third problem? It stems from Domenik Hixon. Amidst the emergence of Mario Manningham and Steve Smith was the disappearance of the mid-July sleeper. In fact? He was on the inactive list this week.
And in this expert league, this league that's supposed to simulate the best of the best? I played a team that started Domenik Hixon. It's something that's not supposed to happen unless it's a Random Yahoo gathering, right?
But in this "Play against the best league," I got to play a man up. I joined this league to avoid that.
C'est la vie.
Saturday, September 26, 2009
The seven things I learned about college football today?
1. Florida State will have at least three more games that will stun the absolute fuck out of conventional wisdom. I know other people have been all over this, so let me nutshell it. They were super scrappy versus Miami and killed BYU's national championship hopes. And then they lost to South Florida and nearly gacked it all over the D1-AA versus Jacksonville State.
2. The meme of TCU as BCS Buster? Just gained a lot of strength. They have to beat BYU in Provo, but that's fine. They win out? Their SOS is a lot stronger than Boise State.
3. Even though the Oregon "upset" of Cal makes Boise State's case for BCS entry a whole lot stronger. I only say upset in quotes because this is how Cal rolls each and every season. Momentairly, they look like a national power. And then they vomit over themselves.
4. Darkhorse National Championship candidate? Cincinnati.
5. The stealth fun game of next week? Wisconsin travels to Minnesota. Weird things happen in Minnesota for Bunyan's Axe. Remember 2005? I do.
...I thought YouTube had a video. Man. Suffice it to say there was a great punt block with 20 seconds to go that the Badgers recovered in the end zone to win. And the finals the last four games in Minnesota.
42-31 Minnesota
37-34 Minnesota
38-34 Wisconsin
41-34 Wisconsin
6. Either Mississippi State is going to be awesome in a year or LSU is going to fall off a cliff. I don't get LSU. And my other job requires me to.
7. Iowa has been a thorn in old man Paterno's side since the Nittany joined the Big 10.
2. The meme of TCU as BCS Buster? Just gained a lot of strength. They have to beat BYU in Provo, but that's fine. They win out? Their SOS is a lot stronger than Boise State.
3. Even though the Oregon "upset" of Cal makes Boise State's case for BCS entry a whole lot stronger. I only say upset in quotes because this is how Cal rolls each and every season. Momentairly, they look like a national power. And then they vomit over themselves.
4. Darkhorse National Championship candidate? Cincinnati.
5. The stealth fun game of next week? Wisconsin travels to Minnesota. Weird things happen in Minnesota for Bunyan's Axe. Remember 2005? I do.
...I thought YouTube had a video. Man. Suffice it to say there was a great punt block with 20 seconds to go that the Badgers recovered in the end zone to win. And the finals the last four games in Minnesota.
42-31 Minnesota
37-34 Minnesota
38-34 Wisconsin
41-34 Wisconsin
6. Either Mississippi State is going to be awesome in a year or LSU is going to fall off a cliff. I don't get LSU. And my other job requires me to.
7. Iowa has been a thorn in old man Paterno's side since the Nittany joined the Big 10.
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
The Top 5 List Triad...
I know I'm going to do this every week. And I know this feels like work. But I will be okay. And I hope I can transfer this advice so you can be okay.
The top 5 guys who are for real.
1. Cedric Benson (RB-Cin) The Packers were supposed to be this stout defense. They were supposed to shut down the Bengals. That didn't happen. Cedric Benson looked spectacular this week. He ran hard and ran well. I'm not saying he's a must start RB1, and he does have 4 games where you would be nigh suicidal to run with him. But that being said? He's gone from nearly out of football to on-field redemption, Thomas Jones style.
2. Laurent Robinson (WR-St. L) Somehow, you get the sense that Donnie Avery might not be the #1 receiver when the going gets tough. Not his fault. But either he's not healthy, or Laurent Robinson's receiver skills have developed trust with the quarterback who can't do it anymore. He's a lottery ticket play for this week. But he's strong as a WR3 right now, and maybe a WR2 in the second half.
3. Mario Manningham (WR-NYG) That sound you hear is the rush of everybody going to make a waiver claim on him. It never was a question of physical gifts with Manningham. And considering that he has the big trust in Manning? He's going to get some numbers this year. Sorry about your luck on a hot start if you need a WR.
4. Willis McGahee (RB-Bal) In this world of the running back tag team? The tag partner that you want is the one who gets the score. And Ray Rice? He's not getting the scores. Never let it be said that I'm not willing to admit when I'm wrong. But like when DeShaun Foster kept the Panthers starting job over DeAngelo Williams? Willis is the most improtant Raven runner.
5. Steve Smith (WR-NYG) Why? Because Hakeem Nicks is good, but with the physical gifts of Manningham, he's going to be lost in the shuffle. Or he's going to take a bite out of Manningham. One out of the two. Steve Smith is going to be a consistent, trusted force.
The top 5 Plug-ins
1. Kevin Kolb (QB-Phi) Kansas City has struggled with quarterbacks of competency this season. It doesn't even matter if Westbrook isn't healthy. You need an emergency QB? Pick up the Kolb Salad.
2. Tashard Choice (RB-Dal) If Barber is unable to go, you can expect to see Felix Jones with around 35-40 percent of the carries. And he could bust a big run off of the Panthers. However? Tashard is going to get the duration of the carries. And he is going to be hyperproductive. He ran hard and well versus the Steelers, Giants, and Ravens while Dallas collapsed around him. You need a runner? Obvious pun goes here.
3. Denver Defense You and I know that you have no reason to keep Denver's defense in a real scenario. But they've actually been pretty good so far. Now it's more scheduling gods than talent. But a game against JaMarcus Russell can cure all ills. I'd start them over the Colts or maybe the Cowboys or Chargers.
4. Nate Burleson (WR-Sea) Nobody really trusts Nate Burleson. He had a good week one. And disappeared in week 2. Suddenly? He's back on the wire in the wake of the Manningham/Smith/Sims-Walker based gold rush. If you missed on that and need someone to go this week? Burleson can help. The Bears can be thrown on.
5. Lynell Hamilton (RB-NO) Buffalo can be run on. Mike Bell and Pierre Thomas are hurt. You can safely keep Reggie Bush as the #3 WR/Sweep specialist. And that means Lynell gets all the run between the tackles. Watch this space, if Pierre is healthy? Never mind. But rush to grab him if he starts.
Five guys I have a bad feeling on...
1. Ryan Grant (RB-GB) Why? Because with Clifton out? The Packers line is in shambles. And if he tries to come back and he's limited? Then the Packers best running offensive value gets destroyed.
2. Carnell Williams (RB-TB) Why? Because his story was good but with three straight against the NFC East? The clock may strike midnight.
3. Donovan McNabb (QB-Phi) Why? Because he isn't anything beyond a marginal starter until Week 13. Sure, he could surpass projections, but it's a toxic environment for McNabb. Garcia, Kolb, and Vick are all people that Iggles fans have an affinity for.
4. Randy Moss (WR-NE) After the Bye? Five out of his next six games are really bad matchups. He's bound to get out on a bit of a run before the bye. You can shunt him off on some WR-starved team for great value.
5. Greg Olson (TE-Chi) It's kind of representative of the Bears in general. We have nothing established for the Bears. Not to say that they aren't a bad team, but they are a team where Cutler's running it by committee. And the supposed superstar may be doomed because of it. That being said? I'm not going to panic dump him until after Week 8. But it is a personal bad feeling.
The top 5 guys who are for real.
1. Cedric Benson (RB-Cin) The Packers were supposed to be this stout defense. They were supposed to shut down the Bengals. That didn't happen. Cedric Benson looked spectacular this week. He ran hard and ran well. I'm not saying he's a must start RB1, and he does have 4 games where you would be nigh suicidal to run with him. But that being said? He's gone from nearly out of football to on-field redemption, Thomas Jones style.
2. Laurent Robinson (WR-St. L) Somehow, you get the sense that Donnie Avery might not be the #1 receiver when the going gets tough. Not his fault. But either he's not healthy, or Laurent Robinson's receiver skills have developed trust with the quarterback who can't do it anymore. He's a lottery ticket play for this week. But he's strong as a WR3 right now, and maybe a WR2 in the second half.
3. Mario Manningham (WR-NYG) That sound you hear is the rush of everybody going to make a waiver claim on him. It never was a question of physical gifts with Manningham. And considering that he has the big trust in Manning? He's going to get some numbers this year. Sorry about your luck on a hot start if you need a WR.
4. Willis McGahee (RB-Bal) In this world of the running back tag team? The tag partner that you want is the one who gets the score. And Ray Rice? He's not getting the scores. Never let it be said that I'm not willing to admit when I'm wrong. But like when DeShaun Foster kept the Panthers starting job over DeAngelo Williams? Willis is the most improtant Raven runner.
5. Steve Smith (WR-NYG) Why? Because Hakeem Nicks is good, but with the physical gifts of Manningham, he's going to be lost in the shuffle. Or he's going to take a bite out of Manningham. One out of the two. Steve Smith is going to be a consistent, trusted force.
The top 5 Plug-ins
1. Kevin Kolb (QB-Phi) Kansas City has struggled with quarterbacks of competency this season. It doesn't even matter if Westbrook isn't healthy. You need an emergency QB? Pick up the Kolb Salad.
2. Tashard Choice (RB-Dal) If Barber is unable to go, you can expect to see Felix Jones with around 35-40 percent of the carries. And he could bust a big run off of the Panthers. However? Tashard is going to get the duration of the carries. And he is going to be hyperproductive. He ran hard and well versus the Steelers, Giants, and Ravens while Dallas collapsed around him. You need a runner? Obvious pun goes here.
3. Denver Defense You and I know that you have no reason to keep Denver's defense in a real scenario. But they've actually been pretty good so far. Now it's more scheduling gods than talent. But a game against JaMarcus Russell can cure all ills. I'd start them over the Colts or maybe the Cowboys or Chargers.
4. Nate Burleson (WR-Sea) Nobody really trusts Nate Burleson. He had a good week one. And disappeared in week 2. Suddenly? He's back on the wire in the wake of the Manningham/Smith/Sims-Walker based gold rush. If you missed on that and need someone to go this week? Burleson can help. The Bears can be thrown on.
5. Lynell Hamilton (RB-NO) Buffalo can be run on. Mike Bell and Pierre Thomas are hurt. You can safely keep Reggie Bush as the #3 WR/Sweep specialist. And that means Lynell gets all the run between the tackles. Watch this space, if Pierre is healthy? Never mind. But rush to grab him if he starts.
Five guys I have a bad feeling on...
1. Ryan Grant (RB-GB) Why? Because with Clifton out? The Packers line is in shambles. And if he tries to come back and he's limited? Then the Packers best running offensive value gets destroyed.
2. Carnell Williams (RB-TB) Why? Because his story was good but with three straight against the NFC East? The clock may strike midnight.
3. Donovan McNabb (QB-Phi) Why? Because he isn't anything beyond a marginal starter until Week 13. Sure, he could surpass projections, but it's a toxic environment for McNabb. Garcia, Kolb, and Vick are all people that Iggles fans have an affinity for.
4. Randy Moss (WR-NE) After the Bye? Five out of his next six games are really bad matchups. He's bound to get out on a bit of a run before the bye. You can shunt him off on some WR-starved team for great value.
5. Greg Olson (TE-Chi) It's kind of representative of the Bears in general. We have nothing established for the Bears. Not to say that they aren't a bad team, but they are a team where Cutler's running it by committee. And the supposed superstar may be doomed because of it. That being said? I'm not going to panic dump him until after Week 8. But it is a personal bad feeling.
Sunday, September 20, 2009
The Seven Things I learned about College Football.
Another interesting lesson coming up on us this week. I took the week at half-speed. Florida took the week at half-speed. I laid my hands upon a man with a bad back and he yelled, "I'm the King of Spain!"
But I digress.
7. Cal better not relax.
Sure, with the running back who's the best around? They should be fine when Oregon comes around. That being said? USC got jumped by Washington. This means they're going to be at their best for Cal. Jahvid Best is a freak of nature, but this is the sort of team that puts out their Combat Rock album in mid-October.
6. Bold prediction: Cincinnati will run the table.
It's not really bold per se, but I would be stunned if they lost. Brian Kelly's built a real program here. The biggest upset in the Big East would be if they weren't the Champions. Pike to Gilyard and Cincy goes hard. Or something like that.
5. If Jacory Harris gets to the Florida A&M game undefeated?
Three things will occur. One, The U will officially be back, as they have played the ACC contenders and Oklahoma. Two, you would have to consider Jacory Harris as a Heisman contender. The third thing? It will cause the world to end, as it will have meant Chris Rix will have seen something before it has developed.
4. And Speaking of Florida State?
That BYU as National Title Contenders meme sure lasted long, didn't it?
3. With the ball in his hands?
Joe Cox is a bad man. Living in the streets with his hands? He's a bad man. He may not show it, but he does have humorously large testicles.
2. Lost amidst the suck vortex that is Jonathan Crompton?
Is the redemption of Chris Todd. With Gus Malzahn calling the plays? Gene Chizik will double his career win total. By October.
1. Game of next week?
I know that the bottom of the ACC should be fired now. But you know what? It's kind of a dull week next week. I know Bama-Arkansas will be fun. And the Houston for BCS meme will get rolling if Case Keenum can outduel Taylor Potts. But South Florida lost Matt Groethe for the year (Ewing theory?) as they play Florida State. So you know what? It's Miami Virginia Tech.
And if an upset happens? That's why it's called an upset.
But I digress.
7. Cal better not relax.
Sure, with the running back who's the best around? They should be fine when Oregon comes around. That being said? USC got jumped by Washington. This means they're going to be at their best for Cal. Jahvid Best is a freak of nature, but this is the sort of team that puts out their Combat Rock album in mid-October.
6. Bold prediction: Cincinnati will run the table.
It's not really bold per se, but I would be stunned if they lost. Brian Kelly's built a real program here. The biggest upset in the Big East would be if they weren't the Champions. Pike to Gilyard and Cincy goes hard. Or something like that.
5. If Jacory Harris gets to the Florida A&M game undefeated?
Three things will occur. One, The U will officially be back, as they have played the ACC contenders and Oklahoma. Two, you would have to consider Jacory Harris as a Heisman contender. The third thing? It will cause the world to end, as it will have meant Chris Rix will have seen something before it has developed.
4. And Speaking of Florida State?
That BYU as National Title Contenders meme sure lasted long, didn't it?
3. With the ball in his hands?
Joe Cox is a bad man. Living in the streets with his hands? He's a bad man. He may not show it, but he does have humorously large testicles.
2. Lost amidst the suck vortex that is Jonathan Crompton?
Is the redemption of Chris Todd. With Gus Malzahn calling the plays? Gene Chizik will double his career win total. By October.
1. Game of next week?
I know that the bottom of the ACC should be fired now. But you know what? It's kind of a dull week next week. I know Bama-Arkansas will be fun. And the Houston for BCS meme will get rolling if Case Keenum can outduel Taylor Potts. But South Florida lost Matt Groethe for the year (Ewing theory?) as they play Florida State. So you know what? It's Miami Virginia Tech.
And if an upset happens? That's why it's called an upset.
Thursday, September 17, 2009
The Film Student Breakdown of Texas-Texas Tech.
You know me. I like movies. I also have this nascent idea that I'm going to write a movie someday. So, for my own personal practice. And because I think this will at least be interesting, if not funny. I will attempt to set a narrative for this game.
We shall call this game Guns Up. It will be the story of a plucky quarterback thrust into the spotlight against an evil empire. In this instance? Texas will be a lietmotif for...the onslaught of Republican anger? No. Texas Tech has that sort of boisterous energy playing fast and loose with the facts with a lesser amount of talent.
So then, what will the Longhorns represent? Yes! The Longhorns represent the rigid corporate structure. Their team is something like a factory, attempting to develop people for a professional career. On the other hand? You look at the Red Raiders and they represent a rugged individualism. Spread 'em and shred 'em right? Right.
And of course, we need a Protagonist for this. An antihero who doesn't seem to have a future at the next level. But you need someone with a real mental toughness and some wacky facial hair. So, obviously, the main character in guns up? Taylor Potts.
I mean, look at this photo. He has the mustache of an antihero. (H/T: EDSBS/link's at the photo)
The Nemesis for this job is the heir to the Longhorn Throne. Will Muschamp. Now, I'm sure he's a gentleman and good to his family and friends in real life, but for my purposes, he beat Bryan Orakpo upside the head and shoulders for insolence and killed Blake Gideon's dog for costing Texas the National Championship game.
Because at present? He is the Diet Coke of evil.
The Mentor is as obvious as the fact that he is going to have to die to make this storyline work. He is a pirate loving, stupid powerful offensive mind, give you sound dating advice, and unafraid to make any powerful organization angry toward him because he knows man. He knows. He's a guru. He's a shaman. He's Charlie fuckin' Kelly. That's Mike Leach.
And as he told the Franchione, if you strike me down I will come back stronger than you can possibly imagine.
The Attractor? The survivng member of the Big 12 conference college of awesome from 2008. Colt McCoy. He's the front man for the corprate entity that wishes to enchroach on the state of play in college football, and he is the George Bush to Will Muschamp's Dick Cheney. Taylor Potts has to be the mustachoied Barack Obama.
(Come on. If it's a movie, it has to be stridently liberal.)
And look at this photo. That is the Democratic Vision of the average Republican. H-HYUCK!
And who is your Trickster? Often times in cinema, you have a mentor who also portrays the role of a trickster. And if someone who says “We’re going to treat (the next three games) all dramatically differently, and there will be all kinds of interesting little twists and nuances that we’ll do to each individual one to dignify it for its importance that exists in the overall scheme of the universe. There’ll be dramatic differences, and throughout the course of that deal, I’ll enjoy talking about it in length.” You know that the Mentor archetype is also a trickster. Mike Leach is your dual archetype. And he has to die.
All has to be lost in Guns Up. All has to be lost for our hero to be redeemed. So barring the tragic circumstances of a head coach dying before his time? This is going to have one of those endings nobody's going to understand. But Peter Travers is going to call it visually arresting.
We shall call this game Guns Up. It will be the story of a plucky quarterback thrust into the spotlight against an evil empire. In this instance? Texas will be a lietmotif for...the onslaught of Republican anger? No. Texas Tech has that sort of boisterous energy playing fast and loose with the facts with a lesser amount of talent.
So then, what will the Longhorns represent? Yes! The Longhorns represent the rigid corporate structure. Their team is something like a factory, attempting to develop people for a professional career. On the other hand? You look at the Red Raiders and they represent a rugged individualism. Spread 'em and shred 'em right? Right.
And of course, we need a Protagonist for this. An antihero who doesn't seem to have a future at the next level. But you need someone with a real mental toughness and some wacky facial hair. So, obviously, the main character in guns up? Taylor Potts.
I mean, look at this photo. He has the mustache of an antihero. (H/T: EDSBS/link's at the photo)
The Nemesis for this job is the heir to the Longhorn Throne. Will Muschamp. Now, I'm sure he's a gentleman and good to his family and friends in real life, but for my purposes, he beat Bryan Orakpo upside the head and shoulders for insolence and killed Blake Gideon's dog for costing Texas the National Championship game.
Because at present? He is the Diet Coke of evil.
The Mentor is as obvious as the fact that he is going to have to die to make this storyline work. He is a pirate loving, stupid powerful offensive mind, give you sound dating advice, and unafraid to make any powerful organization angry toward him because he knows man. He knows. He's a guru. He's a shaman. He's Charlie fuckin' Kelly. That's Mike Leach.
And as he told the Franchione, if you strike me down I will come back stronger than you can possibly imagine.
The Attractor? The survivng member of the Big 12 conference college of awesome from 2008. Colt McCoy. He's the front man for the corprate entity that wishes to enchroach on the state of play in college football, and he is the George Bush to Will Muschamp's Dick Cheney. Taylor Potts has to be the mustachoied Barack Obama.
(Come on. If it's a movie, it has to be stridently liberal.)
And look at this photo. That is the Democratic Vision of the average Republican. H-HYUCK!
And who is your Trickster? Often times in cinema, you have a mentor who also portrays the role of a trickster. And if someone who says “We’re going to treat (the next three games) all dramatically differently, and there will be all kinds of interesting little twists and nuances that we’ll do to each individual one to dignify it for its importance that exists in the overall scheme of the universe. There’ll be dramatic differences, and throughout the course of that deal, I’ll enjoy talking about it in length.” You know that the Mentor archetype is also a trickster. Mike Leach is your dual archetype. And he has to die.
All has to be lost in Guns Up. All has to be lost for our hero to be redeemed. So barring the tragic circumstances of a head coach dying before his time? This is going to have one of those endings nobody's going to understand. But Peter Travers is going to call it visually arresting.
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
A Fantasy Football Top 5 List Triad
I know I'll be late on one of these lists, but I'll bring your information that you need to help your team out. In terms of guys to target as well as guys to dump. From week 1 until I have no reason to do fantasy football references. I will make at least three top five lists.
Top 5 Players You Should Not Press The Panic Button On.
1) Steve Smith (WR-CAR)
--I know that Jake Delhomme has about seventeen forks in his back. But here's the thing? The Panthers have a chance to generate a good offense for the next two months. You get a panicky owner? And you can have him at a low value.
2) Jermichael Finley (TE-GB)
--All summer long, you've heard one thing about Finley. He's going to be the single greatest force in terms of seam-stretching Y-control. And then the regular season rolls around? One target. One grab. Six yards. But he does not have another a bad matchup until Week 11. Stay strong on your sleeper.
3) Marshawn Lynch (RB-Buf)
--Now everybody is talking about Fred Jackson, and his super inspirational story. And you know what? He's probably still rosterable as a handcuff. But here's the deal. Marshawn gets his yards and Marshawn gets his scores. And while he won't be getting the checkdown love? He's still a consistent force. It'll be a mistake to let him go cheap.
4) Willie Parker (RB-Pit)
--Stash him for a month. Because if he is healthy? He is going to make a run at six weeks of glory from Week 5 onward. If you wish to hedge your bets with a Mewelde Moore? I can bless that. But he's not done yet, and Rashard Mendenhall? He just might be.
5) Donnie Avery (WR-St.L)
--Donnie Avery is going to have a tremendous second half. I mean really. The worst match-up that the Rams have from Week 8 onward is at Chicago. I know there's the Bulger problem, but you know what? This team will jell. He will be on my buy low list at some point.
The Top 5 waiver wire pick-ups. Now.
1) Mark Sanchez (QB-NYJ)
--I've got a projection. There will be some story in November asking the question, have rookie quarterbacks turned the corner? The AFC East looks like a very strong division to throw on this season, and add in Tennessee, Tampa Bay, and potentially Atlanta (week 16 at Home) and you have a quarterback with the opportunity to prove himself as a worthy starter.
2) Raiders. Seriously.
--Louis Murphy is big and fast and nearly helped the Raiders shock the world. And until Chaz Schilens comes back from his foot injury, we have the Raiders #1 receiver. But with Chaz Schilens healthy? We've got a competent passing game. Who knew? And in terms of the running game? You cannot ignore the fact that Michael Bush punched it in.
3) Mark Clayton (WR-Bal)
--I know that Joe Flacco was freakish for week one. And I know that Derrick Mason is someone who's made of possession receiving prototyping. But here's the thing. Clayton is healthy. And while Joe Flacco's week one may have been his best? He'll have plenty of opportunity for good games.
4) Earl Bennett (WR-Chi)
--I've made mention of Earl Bennett before as a potential posession receiver with yards after catchability. He proved that right. If he's there, pick him up now. Pittsburgh can be thrown on.
5) The Redskins Defense.
Some of us didn't reach in the seventh round for Pittsburgh or Baltimore. Some of us waited until the next to last round to pick somebody up. But for the next 5 weeks? The Redskins have 4 match-ups of their next 5 where they rank 3rd, 5th, 1st, and 7th when compared to their opponent. Cut them before they play Philly and you're gold.
Top 5 Stash Plays
1) Matt Leinart (QB-Arz)
--Kind of obvious, but come on. I mean, come on. Arizona has a second half built for chucking the ball around the field. And if he sees the field? He's got a shot to be quite successful as well as a non-bust.
2) James Davis (RB-Cle)
--I know, the rumor was that he was so good Jamal Lewis was supposed to be cut. But he's got a great batch of run skills. And if you don't need a positional upgrade, he's worthwhile to hang on to. Truth be told.
3) Laurent Robinson (WR-St.L)--Now I know that some people have been all up in Laurent Robinson and his #1 targets this week. However? Like I said with Donnie Avery. It's a wino eating grapes pickup. Dude. You've got to wait.
4) Deon Butler (WR-Sea)
--He is currently a #3 receiver. And he is likely to stay as a #3 receiver if health permits. But if not? The Seahawks are going to throw on some suckers in the second half of the year. Nate Burleson goes down? Jump on this faster than a fat kid eating cake.
5) Jared Cook (TE-Ten)
--Because he's a man of supreme physical skill in an offense that throws a ridiculous amount to the tight end. What else is there?
Top 5 Players You Should Not Press The Panic Button On.
1) Steve Smith (WR-CAR)
--I know that Jake Delhomme has about seventeen forks in his back. But here's the thing? The Panthers have a chance to generate a good offense for the next two months. You get a panicky owner? And you can have him at a low value.
2) Jermichael Finley (TE-GB)
--All summer long, you've heard one thing about Finley. He's going to be the single greatest force in terms of seam-stretching Y-control. And then the regular season rolls around? One target. One grab. Six yards. But he does not have another a bad matchup until Week 11. Stay strong on your sleeper.
3) Marshawn Lynch (RB-Buf)
--Now everybody is talking about Fred Jackson, and his super inspirational story. And you know what? He's probably still rosterable as a handcuff. But here's the deal. Marshawn gets his yards and Marshawn gets his scores. And while he won't be getting the checkdown love? He's still a consistent force. It'll be a mistake to let him go cheap.
4) Willie Parker (RB-Pit)
--Stash him for a month. Because if he is healthy? He is going to make a run at six weeks of glory from Week 5 onward. If you wish to hedge your bets with a Mewelde Moore? I can bless that. But he's not done yet, and Rashard Mendenhall? He just might be.
5) Donnie Avery (WR-St.L)
--Donnie Avery is going to have a tremendous second half. I mean really. The worst match-up that the Rams have from Week 8 onward is at Chicago. I know there's the Bulger problem, but you know what? This team will jell. He will be on my buy low list at some point.
The Top 5 waiver wire pick-ups. Now.
1) Mark Sanchez (QB-NYJ)
--I've got a projection. There will be some story in November asking the question, have rookie quarterbacks turned the corner? The AFC East looks like a very strong division to throw on this season, and add in Tennessee, Tampa Bay, and potentially Atlanta (week 16 at Home) and you have a quarterback with the opportunity to prove himself as a worthy starter.
2) Raiders. Seriously.
--Louis Murphy is big and fast and nearly helped the Raiders shock the world. And until Chaz Schilens comes back from his foot injury, we have the Raiders #1 receiver. But with Chaz Schilens healthy? We've got a competent passing game. Who knew? And in terms of the running game? You cannot ignore the fact that Michael Bush punched it in.
3) Mark Clayton (WR-Bal)
--I know that Joe Flacco was freakish for week one. And I know that Derrick Mason is someone who's made of possession receiving prototyping. But here's the thing. Clayton is healthy. And while Joe Flacco's week one may have been his best? He'll have plenty of opportunity for good games.
4) Earl Bennett (WR-Chi)
--I've made mention of Earl Bennett before as a potential posession receiver with yards after catchability. He proved that right. If he's there, pick him up now. Pittsburgh can be thrown on.
5) The Redskins Defense.
Some of us didn't reach in the seventh round for Pittsburgh or Baltimore. Some of us waited until the next to last round to pick somebody up. But for the next 5 weeks? The Redskins have 4 match-ups of their next 5 where they rank 3rd, 5th, 1st, and 7th when compared to their opponent. Cut them before they play Philly and you're gold.
Top 5 Stash Plays
1) Matt Leinart (QB-Arz)
--Kind of obvious, but come on. I mean, come on. Arizona has a second half built for chucking the ball around the field. And if he sees the field? He's got a shot to be quite successful as well as a non-bust.
2) James Davis (RB-Cle)
--I know, the rumor was that he was so good Jamal Lewis was supposed to be cut. But he's got a great batch of run skills. And if you don't need a positional upgrade, he's worthwhile to hang on to. Truth be told.
3) Laurent Robinson (WR-St.L)--Now I know that some people have been all up in Laurent Robinson and his #1 targets this week. However? Like I said with Donnie Avery. It's a wino eating grapes pickup. Dude. You've got to wait.
4) Deon Butler (WR-Sea)
--He is currently a #3 receiver. And he is likely to stay as a #3 receiver if health permits. But if not? The Seahawks are going to throw on some suckers in the second half of the year. Nate Burleson goes down? Jump on this faster than a fat kid eating cake.
5) Jared Cook (TE-Ten)
--Because he's a man of supreme physical skill in an offense that throws a ridiculous amount to the tight end. What else is there?
Saturday, September 12, 2009
The Seven Things I Learned About College Football this week.
I did this one last week. I looked smart at one point from it this week. But I'm going to give it another go.
7) If you live on the East Coast? Watch the Colonial Athletic Association.
Maryland had to escape in overtime to beat James Madison 38-35. If they didn't? It would have been the Colonial's third win against the ACC. As it is? Give it up for New Hampshire. They took down Ball State 23-16. That's the CAA's 4th win versus an upper level team. They may be designated at a lower level, but this conference is for real.
6) Conversely? The ACC is going to have a classically down year.
It took a late touchdown for Florida State to beat Jacksonville State. They were down 9-7 for the majority of the game. Add to that UNC needing a UConn mistake in the end zone leading to a safety and I'm honestly thinking that this conference won't deserve an automatic bid either. The way things are going, a Nebraska win next week in Blacksburg won't stun me.
Bonus round? Georgia Tech has to go to Miami next week. that will go a long way to eating the ACC. Because, see. Miami is going to win.
5) This year more than any, games won't be played on paper.
I know Houston-Oklahoma State was going to be a shootout, but even if people thought that Georgia and South Carolina would be decided by a blocked extra point, anyone who thought 41-37 as a final for that game would be mocked. And rightfully so.
4) I'm still going with Cal as the sleeper National Championship team.
Oregon can't stop anybody. And Matt Barkley is not awesome at hitting the trial by fire. Cal may trip itself up, but if anybody outside the Florida-Texas-USC phylum makes the National Championship game. My bet is on Cal.
3) Even if Oklahoma State isn't National Championship Caliber?
Dez Bryant is worthy of the #1 pick.
2) If I had to pick a Freshman Quarterback to win me one game?
Tate Forcier. Barkley was impressive, but Forcier has a little more swagger to his stride.
1) Next week is going to be a very scary scenario for big schools.
Another flat start next week, and Texas could get shot out by the magic mustache of Taylor Potts. Minnesota is a resillient team, and could very well keep Cal in a game. And Toledo? Dare I say it. Ohio State just got its heart broken. And Toledo is flying. And this is at a neutral site.
Nah...
LISTATORIUM
The Five Coaches who are most likely not last the year.
1) Al Groh, Virginia
2) Dan Hawkins, Colorado
3) George O' Leary, UCF
4) Mike Samford, UNLV
5) Ralph Fridgen, Maryland
7) If you live on the East Coast? Watch the Colonial Athletic Association.
Maryland had to escape in overtime to beat James Madison 38-35. If they didn't? It would have been the Colonial's third win against the ACC. As it is? Give it up for New Hampshire. They took down Ball State 23-16. That's the CAA's 4th win versus an upper level team. They may be designated at a lower level, but this conference is for real.
6) Conversely? The ACC is going to have a classically down year.
It took a late touchdown for Florida State to beat Jacksonville State. They were down 9-7 for the majority of the game. Add to that UNC needing a UConn mistake in the end zone leading to a safety and I'm honestly thinking that this conference won't deserve an automatic bid either. The way things are going, a Nebraska win next week in Blacksburg won't stun me.
Bonus round? Georgia Tech has to go to Miami next week. that will go a long way to eating the ACC. Because, see. Miami is going to win.
5) This year more than any, games won't be played on paper.
I know Houston-Oklahoma State was going to be a shootout, but even if people thought that Georgia and South Carolina would be decided by a blocked extra point, anyone who thought 41-37 as a final for that game would be mocked. And rightfully so.
4) I'm still going with Cal as the sleeper National Championship team.
Oregon can't stop anybody. And Matt Barkley is not awesome at hitting the trial by fire. Cal may trip itself up, but if anybody outside the Florida-Texas-USC phylum makes the National Championship game. My bet is on Cal.
3) Even if Oklahoma State isn't National Championship Caliber?
Dez Bryant is worthy of the #1 pick.
2) If I had to pick a Freshman Quarterback to win me one game?
Tate Forcier. Barkley was impressive, but Forcier has a little more swagger to his stride.
1) Next week is going to be a very scary scenario for big schools.
Another flat start next week, and Texas could get shot out by the magic mustache of Taylor Potts. Minnesota is a resillient team, and could very well keep Cal in a game. And Toledo? Dare I say it. Ohio State just got its heart broken. And Toledo is flying. And this is at a neutral site.
Nah...
LISTATORIUM
The Five Coaches who are most likely not last the year.
1) Al Groh, Virginia
2) Dan Hawkins, Colorado
3) George O' Leary, UCF
4) Mike Samford, UNLV
5) Ralph Fridgen, Maryland
And now, a dramatic reenactment of Toledo versus Colorado.
Toledo Coach Tim Beckman is the Blue Hag.
Colorado's illusions of being a National Power have been blowed up and Toledo was the Odin that did it.
Colorado's illusions of being a National Power have been blowed up and Toledo was the Odin that did it.
Thursday, September 10, 2009
So, who's going to make the playoffs and who's going to win the Super Bowl?
I'll do this via the process of elimination. We have 32 teams, and we need to get down to 12. And then from 12 we need to get ourselves down to one. I'll keep this fast paced and conversational.
Out via the process of a complete mess.
We've never had an offseason where we have had three offensive coordinators get fired in the preseason. And as such? You can knock out Tampa Bay, Buffalo, and Kansas City from the proceedings. With the ham-fisted handling of the Jay Cutler and Brandon Marshall situations, Denver gets knocked out. And Oakland? Oakland is Oakland. Any year they aren't drafting in the top 10 is a surprise.
Out via the process of a partial mess.
With the insane behavior of Michael Crabtree and his tag team partner Eugene Parker? San Fransisco is out. The Hard Knocks curse + Andre Smith + The 6th round pick who once punched out a coach equals Cincinnati is out. Detroit will be better, but the copycat teams in the NFL? They do not bring as much success and off of an 0-16 record, the talent level doesn't skyrocket. Especially in the NFC North.
Out via strengthened schedules?
You can call the failings of Arizona as a by-product of a dual curse. (Madden and Super Bowl loser). And considering that surprise teams rarely have a good encore season? You can use that to knock out Miami and Atlanta. And I don't think we're going to see Baltimore and Tennessee make return trips.
Out because their quarterback is an old man/useless/both?
Minnesota. There are two teams with a real buzz to them, and neither one of them has a 40 year old man with a torn bicep. Houston? Matt Schaub is someone who can only stay upright for 10 to 12 games. And with Rex Grossman as your back-up? It's bad mojo. St. Louis is out because it's Marc Bulger as their starter and nobody rightfully believes in Kyle Boller. And Carolina has a worse defense to go with Jake Delhomme. And despite me stupidly thinking that they could actually make a deep run, I can't pull the trigger on Cleveland. And Jason Campbell, I like him, but he's in the wrong situation to make his way in the world, so goodbye Washington.
Just missing the playoffs?
Dallas. Because fuck them.
So here's our 12 playoff teams.
AFC
1. Pittsburgh
2. Indianapolis
3. San Diego
4. New England
5. Jacksonville
6. NY Jets
NFC
1. New York Giants
2. Green Bay
3. New Orleans
4. Seattle
5. Chicago
6. Philadelphia
Wild Card Weekend?
New England beats the Jets, on account of them putting up a number that the Jets can't match.
San Diego beats Jacksonville, on account of them being able to throw the ball.
New Orleans beats Philadelphia in the game of the weekend.
Chicago beats Seattle. Matt Forte comes up strong.
Divisional Playoffs?
Indianapolis beats New England. Bob Sanders is healthy. It decides things.
San Diego beats Pittsburgh. Because Jesus owes Phillip Rivers.
The Giants beat Chicago in the Lee Marvin game of the divisional round.
Green Bay beats New Orelans in the 1980's WAC game in the second round. 45-31. Yeah.
Championship Game
Indianapolis beats San Diego.
And...here we go. Green Bay wins because the way Eli Manning won the Super Bowl is because he played the five greatest weeks of his life to get there and then the defense took over. The Giants defense isn't as good. And the Packers have more offensive weapons. Is not a homer pick.
Super Bowl
Green Bay 35
Indianapolis 24
Though the buzz on the Packers makes me wince a little. I am excited.
Out via the process of a complete mess.
We've never had an offseason where we have had three offensive coordinators get fired in the preseason. And as such? You can knock out Tampa Bay, Buffalo, and Kansas City from the proceedings. With the ham-fisted handling of the Jay Cutler and Brandon Marshall situations, Denver gets knocked out. And Oakland? Oakland is Oakland. Any year they aren't drafting in the top 10 is a surprise.
Out via the process of a partial mess.
With the insane behavior of Michael Crabtree and his tag team partner Eugene Parker? San Fransisco is out. The Hard Knocks curse + Andre Smith + The 6th round pick who once punched out a coach equals Cincinnati is out. Detroit will be better, but the copycat teams in the NFL? They do not bring as much success and off of an 0-16 record, the talent level doesn't skyrocket. Especially in the NFC North.
Out via strengthened schedules?
You can call the failings of Arizona as a by-product of a dual curse. (Madden and Super Bowl loser). And considering that surprise teams rarely have a good encore season? You can use that to knock out Miami and Atlanta. And I don't think we're going to see Baltimore and Tennessee make return trips.
Out because their quarterback is an old man/useless/both?
Minnesota. There are two teams with a real buzz to them, and neither one of them has a 40 year old man with a torn bicep. Houston? Matt Schaub is someone who can only stay upright for 10 to 12 games. And with Rex Grossman as your back-up? It's bad mojo. St. Louis is out because it's Marc Bulger as their starter and nobody rightfully believes in Kyle Boller. And Carolina has a worse defense to go with Jake Delhomme. And despite me stupidly thinking that they could actually make a deep run, I can't pull the trigger on Cleveland. And Jason Campbell, I like him, but he's in the wrong situation to make his way in the world, so goodbye Washington.
Just missing the playoffs?
Dallas. Because fuck them.
So here's our 12 playoff teams.
AFC
1. Pittsburgh
2. Indianapolis
3. San Diego
4. New England
5. Jacksonville
6. NY Jets
NFC
1. New York Giants
2. Green Bay
3. New Orleans
4. Seattle
5. Chicago
6. Philadelphia
Wild Card Weekend?
New England beats the Jets, on account of them putting up a number that the Jets can't match.
San Diego beats Jacksonville, on account of them being able to throw the ball.
New Orleans beats Philadelphia in the game of the weekend.
Chicago beats Seattle. Matt Forte comes up strong.
Divisional Playoffs?
Indianapolis beats New England. Bob Sanders is healthy. It decides things.
San Diego beats Pittsburgh. Because Jesus owes Phillip Rivers.
The Giants beat Chicago in the Lee Marvin game of the divisional round.
Green Bay beats New Orelans in the 1980's WAC game in the second round. 45-31. Yeah.
Championship Game
Indianapolis beats San Diego.
And...here we go. Green Bay wins because the way Eli Manning won the Super Bowl is because he played the five greatest weeks of his life to get there and then the defense took over. The Giants defense isn't as good. And the Packers have more offensive weapons. Is not a homer pick.
Super Bowl
Green Bay 35
Indianapolis 24
Though the buzz on the Packers makes me wince a little. I am excited.
Wednesday, September 2, 2009
Wednesday, August 26, 2009
A draft in repose...
The Brian Michael Bendis forum is a pop culture hodgepodgeatorium with an obvious comic book bent to their style. But there is an actual active fantasy football community. At least enough for two leagues. This one was the one deemed expert.
I came in the young upstart. I want you to check this team out and my thought processes behind it.
Quarterbacks
I went with a pairing that I could use in a committee format if necessary and I found that at least one of them would have upside. David Garrard is the one who I'm expecting to take the lion's share of the snaps. He actually has receivers now. Apparently. Ben Roethlisberger was just too much of a value in the tenth round not to be selected. He's a better real football player, but this is a good committee.
Running Backs
The draft started with what some people would consider a mistake. Maurice Jones-Drew was available at #3. I passed on him. For DeAngelo Williams. I don't have Jon Stewart. But this is going to be a strong move because Jon Stewart is having achilles issues.
Ronnie Brown at #2? It's a contract year. And as a third round pick goes? Gotta love it. And with some PPR value? Darren McFadden is a strong 3rd running back/4th round pick.
But wait! There's more. With a return bonus as well as some PPR value, if this be the year Leon Washington becomes Tiki Barber, I will get myself some maximum value. And Earnest Graham as a #5 is simply solid. Michael Bush as an RB6? That was just me showing off.
Wide Receivers
A 12 team league, I'm picking 3rd. With 19 picks in between DeAngelo Williams and Round 2? What would I do? I would have Calvin Johnson fall into my lap. Megatron means the kid got lucky.
Nothing else inspires nearly as much love. Santonio Holmes and Jerricho Cotchery are both solid. Holmes missed his breakout year. Cotchery is a possession guy. I still like Josh Morgan's upside, even as his average draft position slides back into the mid-30's. And Devin Thomas? Likely gonna be cut.
Stupid Malcolm Kelly.
Tight Ends
Antonio Gates and Dustin Keller. Yeah. I feel strong here.
Kicker
Neil Rackers? Text-based fart noise.
Team Defense
As this is a Yahoo league? I got screwed into getting the Miami Defense. I cut them for the Jacksonville Defense right after the draft. On paper, they're not much better, but they have the schedule to get hot quickly. And teams with good defenses by Week 4 are in great shape.
The Packers should be fine. I like them.
IDP
I used a cheatsheet here. And according to the fine folks who built Draft Dominator? I am ridiculously strong here. Terrell Suggs? DL1. Barrett Rudd? LB1! Adrian Wilson? DB...2 But he comes with Kerry Rhodes at DB3! I hate IDP. But that was fun.
All in all? Good luck, and I make the playoffs. Where my stupidity will cost me cash and prizes!
WHOO!
I came in the young upstart. I want you to check this team out and my thought processes behind it.
Quarterbacks
I went with a pairing that I could use in a committee format if necessary and I found that at least one of them would have upside. David Garrard is the one who I'm expecting to take the lion's share of the snaps. He actually has receivers now. Apparently. Ben Roethlisberger was just too much of a value in the tenth round not to be selected. He's a better real football player, but this is a good committee.
Running Backs
The draft started with what some people would consider a mistake. Maurice Jones-Drew was available at #3. I passed on him. For DeAngelo Williams. I don't have Jon Stewart. But this is going to be a strong move because Jon Stewart is having achilles issues.
Ronnie Brown at #2? It's a contract year. And as a third round pick goes? Gotta love it. And with some PPR value? Darren McFadden is a strong 3rd running back/4th round pick.
But wait! There's more. With a return bonus as well as some PPR value, if this be the year Leon Washington becomes Tiki Barber, I will get myself some maximum value. And Earnest Graham as a #5 is simply solid. Michael Bush as an RB6? That was just me showing off.
Wide Receivers
A 12 team league, I'm picking 3rd. With 19 picks in between DeAngelo Williams and Round 2? What would I do? I would have Calvin Johnson fall into my lap. Megatron means the kid got lucky.
Nothing else inspires nearly as much love. Santonio Holmes and Jerricho Cotchery are both solid. Holmes missed his breakout year. Cotchery is a possession guy. I still like Josh Morgan's upside, even as his average draft position slides back into the mid-30's. And Devin Thomas? Likely gonna be cut.
Stupid Malcolm Kelly.
Tight Ends
Antonio Gates and Dustin Keller. Yeah. I feel strong here.
Kicker
Neil Rackers? Text-based fart noise.
Team Defense
As this is a Yahoo league? I got screwed into getting the Miami Defense. I cut them for the Jacksonville Defense right after the draft. On paper, they're not much better, but they have the schedule to get hot quickly. And teams with good defenses by Week 4 are in great shape.
The Packers should be fine. I like them.
IDP
I used a cheatsheet here. And according to the fine folks who built Draft Dominator? I am ridiculously strong here. Terrell Suggs? DL1. Barrett Rudd? LB1! Adrian Wilson? DB...2 But he comes with Kerry Rhodes at DB3! I hate IDP. But that was fun.
All in all? Good luck, and I make the playoffs. Where my stupidity will cost me cash and prizes!
WHOO!
Monday, August 24, 2009
Is Shaun Hill a sleeper?
I mean, he is the Niners QB for better or worse. And last year, he was starter worthy during the second half of the season. But the offense isn't going to be near as pass happy. Logically? He's a QB2 who will be rated in the mid-20's by most people. You can make a steal in the 14th round.
Nothing wrong with that.
Nothing wrong with that.
Edgerrin James: Does it matter?
Likely no.
Not to say that he's not going to get playing time in Seattle. It's Julius Jones and Justin Forsett, with T.J. Duckett's disappearance. And that means he is at the simplest, he's going to be the goalline vulture. But that being said? The line sucks and Edge is old.
If he had anything left in the tank, he wouldn't have been signed during the stretch where everybody's drafting. But since he's going to get carries? You have to know. And I'll tell you.
He's a fringe RB3. He'll get a lot of carries at the get go. But he's going to be Jamal Lewis with more carries and fewer yards. Pass on him until Round 9/10. Don't stretch.
Not to say that he's not going to get playing time in Seattle. It's Julius Jones and Justin Forsett, with T.J. Duckett's disappearance. And that means he is at the simplest, he's going to be the goalline vulture. But that being said? The line sucks and Edge is old.
If he had anything left in the tank, he wouldn't have been signed during the stretch where everybody's drafting. But since he's going to get carries? You have to know. And I'll tell you.
He's a fringe RB3. He'll get a lot of carries at the get go. But he's going to be Jamal Lewis with more carries and fewer yards. Pass on him until Round 9/10. Don't stretch.
Sunday, August 23, 2009
Troy Williamson: Really?
I can't believe that I'm going to blog about this. The post-hype sleeper is almost non-existent in fantasy football. You get your shot, and you miss? You don't get the second chance to make a first impression. Well, unless your name is Thomas Jones.
Or Troy Williamson?
It's not as insane as you would think. Sleepers are all about skills, means, and opportunity. And with the 350th injury to Mike Walker? Suddenly, Troy Williamson has a second chance to make a first impression.
But will he? The reason why he was fail in Minnesota was because he had problems catching the ball. Now, I'm sure some of this was based on problems tracking the ball in flight. But are we going to see him suddenly struggle again? I mean, the Jags love their rookies.
This is actually a must-watch scenario. You're looking at him as a strictly last round thing. But oddly enough, he's got a chance of glory. And isn't that what you want? A speedburner with upside? I'd say so.
Or Troy Williamson?
It's not as insane as you would think. Sleepers are all about skills, means, and opportunity. And with the 350th injury to Mike Walker? Suddenly, Troy Williamson has a second chance to make a first impression.
But will he? The reason why he was fail in Minnesota was because he had problems catching the ball. Now, I'm sure some of this was based on problems tracking the ball in flight. But are we going to see him suddenly struggle again? I mean, the Jags love their rookies.
This is actually a must-watch scenario. You're looking at him as a strictly last round thing. But oddly enough, he's got a chance of glory. And isn't that what you want? A speedburner with upside? I'd say so.
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