B.J. Novak is now the less annoying Ryan Howard.

Now it's not the Subway pitchman's fault. If you were offered 125 million dollars over five years? Goes without saying you'd take it. I mean, you'd be taken to an asylum if you said, "No! I don't want to be paid 25 million dollars to play a sport when I'm 36! That's crazy for you to offer!"

But why Ryan Howard is so annoying is because my favorite local sports team has a first baseman of boldness and genius power. Sure, he enjoys candy a little too much, but he's strong and as long as he's a Brewer? He's going to be someone I enjoy a lot.

But with the Ryan Howard contract? There's no way he's returning. I'm not going to say that I was so naive as to believe that he was anything close to a 50/50 shot to come back. I know basic math and probabilities. But you know what?

I wanted to believe. Hope's a good thing. I mean it's hard to be an idealist upon the internet. And now? In this aspect of my life, I cannot feel good about it. Prince is as good as gone.

Ryan Howard put the final nail in the coffin.