Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Hello. A Hilarious Comedian Joins Two Basketball Stars In A Commercial. This is a Preview

Chris Hardwick, you've done it again!

Note: The G4 network HTML wasn't an easy copy paste onto the website. Considering they try to fill the tech niche? Warrants mentioning.

Monday, September 28, 2009

10 NFL Notes/Reactions/Twitter-size Rambles.

You know how this makes me feel? I'm really someone who likes to keep the original content going. I don't want to use numbers as a prompt for my post. But since I want to provide content, here we go.

10. I'm excited that Josh Johnson is getting run as a starting quarterback. He's a dynamic force who has been hyperproductive in the lower level. That being said? Washington and Philadeplhia are going to be real challenges for Johnson straight away. It does get easier in the second half.

9. With Laurent Robinson being out for the season, the Rams look like they are going to be a serious threat for 0-16. But I could see a scenario where they make a post bye week dead cat bounce.

8. I am still going to hang on to Chaz Schilens for one more week. You can replace all Raiders not named Darren McFadden if you want. Depending on the activity of your waiver wire, Zach Miller falls into the droppable list. But 8 out of 10 situations you need to hang on.

7. Obvious waiver wire pick-up for a Laurent Robinson owner? Pierre Garcon.

6. The running back I would trade for? Marshawn Lynch. A bad team's RB1 who gets the majority of carries a.k.a. Darren McFadden? That would be my trade. Why? While Fred Jackson will get a Reggie Bush sort of run, Marshawn will get 200 carries and all the goal line stuff.

5. If Ted Ginn struggles the rest of the way? We can write him off.

4. The best fantasy football plug-in running back for the next two weeks? Glen Coffee. Start your puns...now!

3. Chris Henry has been lost in the shuffle. The only way he's currently playable is in a TD-only league when you're hurting. Drop him everywhere else for now.

2. The sleeper of 2009? The Bengals. Seriously.

1. One of the rare Fantasy Football games I really want is happening next week. Hef is the proprietor of Major League Jerk. You have seem me with caps locked text in his general direction on several occasions via the the twitter. I play him this week. I'm a 65 point underdog. I want the single greatest upset in the Twitter based sportsblog action league history.

I need this.

Sunday, September 27, 2009

RapidDraft: The worst Fantasy Football Site Ever.

Not to say that it's not an intriguing concept. You take ten media based fantasy sports experts and last years champion. You have a speed draft. And you. You pick the spot. And it should be fun, right?

Well, I got a free entry. So I thought to myself. Sure. Spin the wheel and make the deal. And even with a free entry?

It's godawful.

It's godawful for three reasons. It's godawful because when you consider the fact that a text based search box has been in every website's interface since the days when Ray Lucas was a worthwhile waiver wire pick-up. But it's not here. So if you wanted to draft Ray Rice, you would have to scroll up and down to get him.

Also? For waiver purposes? Other sites have their own problems, but with no text box and sorting people by first name? That's indefensible. That shows that someone illogical was running the web interface.

And you know the third problem? It stems from Domenik Hixon. Amidst the emergence of Mario Manningham and Steve Smith was the disappearance of the mid-July sleeper. In fact? He was on the inactive list this week.

And in this expert league, this league that's supposed to simulate the best of the best? I played a team that started Domenik Hixon. It's something that's not supposed to happen unless it's a Random Yahoo gathering, right?

But in this "Play against the best league," I got to play a man up. I joined this league to avoid that.

C'est la vie.

Saturday, September 26, 2009

The seven things I learned about college football today?

1. Florida State will have at least three more games that will stun the absolute fuck out of conventional wisdom. I know other people have been all over this, so let me nutshell it. They were super scrappy versus Miami and killed BYU's national championship hopes. And then they lost to South Florida and nearly gacked it all over the D1-AA versus Jacksonville State.

2. The meme of TCU as BCS Buster? Just gained a lot of strength. They have to beat BYU in Provo, but that's fine. They win out? Their SOS is a lot stronger than Boise State.

3. Even though the Oregon "upset" of Cal makes Boise State's case for BCS entry a whole lot stronger. I only say upset in quotes because this is how Cal rolls each and every season. Momentairly, they look like a national power. And then they vomit over themselves.

4. Darkhorse National Championship candidate? Cincinnati.

5. The stealth fun game of next week? Wisconsin travels to Minnesota. Weird things happen in Minnesota for Bunyan's Axe. Remember 2005? I do.

...I thought YouTube had a video. Man. Suffice it to say there was a great punt block with 20 seconds to go that the Badgers recovered in the end zone to win. And the finals the last four games in Minnesota.

42-31 Minnesota
37-34 Minnesota
38-34 Wisconsin
41-34 Wisconsin

6. Either Mississippi State is going to be awesome in a year or LSU is going to fall off a cliff. I don't get LSU. And my other job requires me to.

7. Iowa has been a thorn in old man Paterno's side since the Nittany joined the Big 10.

Thursday, September 24, 2009

When my radar suddenly picks up on the drug dealing arrest of Binghamton's point guard?

You know who is going to start to work on a project post.


Wednesday, September 23, 2009

The Top 5 List Triad...

I know I'm going to do this every week. And I know this feels like work. But I will be okay. And I hope I can transfer this advice so you can be okay.

The top 5 guys who are for real.

1. Cedric Benson (RB-Cin) The Packers were supposed to be this stout defense. They were supposed to shut down the Bengals. That didn't happen. Cedric Benson looked spectacular this week. He ran hard and ran well. I'm not saying he's a must start RB1, and he does have 4 games where you would be nigh suicidal to run with him. But that being said? He's gone from nearly out of football to on-field redemption, Thomas Jones style.

2. Laurent Robinson (WR-St. L) Somehow, you get the sense that Donnie Avery might not be the #1 receiver when the going gets tough. Not his fault. But either he's not healthy, or Laurent Robinson's receiver skills have developed trust with the quarterback who can't do it anymore. He's a lottery ticket play for this week. But he's strong as a WR3 right now, and maybe a WR2 in the second half.

3. Mario Manningham (WR-NYG) That sound you hear is the rush of everybody going to make a waiver claim on him. It never was a question of physical gifts with Manningham. And considering that he has the big trust in Manning? He's going to get some numbers this year. Sorry about your luck on a hot start if you need a WR.

4. Willis McGahee (RB-Bal) In this world of the running back tag team? The tag partner that you want is the one who gets the score. And Ray Rice? He's not getting the scores. Never let it be said that I'm not willing to admit when I'm wrong. But like when DeShaun Foster kept the Panthers starting job over DeAngelo Williams? Willis is the most improtant Raven runner.

5. Steve Smith (WR-NYG) Why? Because Hakeem Nicks is good, but with the physical gifts of Manningham, he's going to be lost in the shuffle. Or he's going to take a bite out of Manningham. One out of the two. Steve Smith is going to be a consistent, trusted force.

The top 5 Plug-ins

1. Kevin Kolb (QB-Phi) Kansas City has struggled with quarterbacks of competency this season. It doesn't even matter if Westbrook isn't healthy. You need an emergency QB? Pick up the Kolb Salad.

2. Tashard Choice (RB-Dal) If Barber is unable to go, you can expect to see Felix Jones with around 35-40 percent of the carries. And he could bust a big run off of the Panthers. However? Tashard is going to get the duration of the carries. And he is going to be hyperproductive. He ran hard and well versus the Steelers, Giants, and Ravens while Dallas collapsed around him. You need a runner? Obvious pun goes here.

3. Denver Defense You and I know that you have no reason to keep Denver's defense in a real scenario. But they've actually been pretty good so far. Now it's more scheduling gods than talent. But a game against JaMarcus Russell can cure all ills. I'd start them over the Colts or maybe the Cowboys or Chargers.

4. Nate Burleson (WR-Sea) Nobody really trusts Nate Burleson. He had a good week one. And disappeared in week 2. Suddenly? He's back on the wire in the wake of the Manningham/Smith/Sims-Walker based gold rush. If you missed on that and need someone to go this week? Burleson can help. The Bears can be thrown on.

5. Lynell Hamilton (RB-NO) Buffalo can be run on. Mike Bell and Pierre Thomas are hurt. You can safely keep Reggie Bush as the #3 WR/Sweep specialist. And that means Lynell gets all the run between the tackles. Watch this space, if Pierre is healthy? Never mind. But rush to grab him if he starts.

Five guys I have a bad feeling on...

1. Ryan Grant (RB-GB) Why? Because with Clifton out? The Packers line is in shambles. And if he tries to come back and he's limited? Then the Packers best running offensive value gets destroyed.
2. Carnell Williams (RB-TB) Why? Because his story was good but with three straight against the NFC East? The clock may strike midnight.
3. Donovan McNabb (QB-Phi) Why? Because he isn't anything beyond a marginal starter until Week 13. Sure, he could surpass projections, but it's a toxic environment for McNabb. Garcia, Kolb, and Vick are all people that Iggles fans have an affinity for.
4. Randy Moss (WR-NE) After the Bye? Five out of his next six games are really bad matchups. He's bound to get out on a bit of a run before the bye. You can shunt him off on some WR-starved team for great value.
5. Greg Olson (TE-Chi) It's kind of representative of the Bears in general. We have nothing established for the Bears. Not to say that they aren't a bad team, but they are a team where Cutler's running it by committee. And the supposed superstar may be doomed because of it. That being said? I'm not going to panic dump him until after Week 8. But it is a personal bad feeling.

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

I'm trying to bring something to the plate.

But right now? I'm kind of writer's blocked. I don't know what exactly to tell you. I need a new angle. I need something. You know I'm still at SECFootball Blogger. And I'm in a weird 16-7 record against the spread. College football is kind of easy if you take a conference and learn it.

But until I have something? I'm sorry.

Watch the RSS or my twitter for my next post.

Monday, September 21, 2009

I'll have more tomorrow.

Brief List for tonight.

I'm in several leagues. And there are 8 receivers you don't have to be super desperate for an upgrade to pick them up. So here you go.

8) Jacoby Jones (WR-Hou)
7) Johnny Knox (WR-Chi)
6) Bobby Wade (WR-KC)
5) Pierre Garcon (WR-Ind)
4) Laurent Robinson (WR-St. L)
3) Chansi Stuckey (WR-NYJ)
2) Mike Sims-Walker (WR-Jax)
1) Mario Manningham (WR-NYG)

Sunday, September 20, 2009

The Seven Things I learned about College Football.

Another interesting lesson coming up on us this week. I took the week at half-speed. Florida took the week at half-speed. I laid my hands upon a man with a bad back and he yelled, "I'm the King of Spain!"

But I digress.

7. Cal better not relax.

Sure, with the running back who's the best around? They should be fine when Oregon comes around. That being said? USC got jumped by Washington. This means they're going to be at their best for Cal. Jahvid Best is a freak of nature, but this is the sort of team that puts out their Combat Rock album in mid-October.

6. Bold prediction: Cincinnati will run the table.

It's not really bold per se, but I would be stunned if they lost. Brian Kelly's built a real program here. The biggest upset in the Big East would be if they weren't the Champions. Pike to Gilyard and Cincy goes hard. Or something like that.

5. If Jacory Harris gets to the Florida A&M game undefeated?

Three things will occur. One, The U will officially be back, as they have played the ACC contenders and Oklahoma. Two, you would have to consider Jacory Harris as a Heisman contender. The third thing? It will cause the world to end, as it will have meant Chris Rix will have seen something before it has developed.

4. And Speaking of Florida State?

That BYU as National Title Contenders meme sure lasted long, didn't it?

3. With the ball in his hands?

Joe Cox is a bad man. Living in the streets with his hands? He's a bad man. He may not show it, but he does have humorously large testicles.

2. Lost amidst the suck vortex that is Jonathan Crompton?

Is the redemption of Chris Todd. With Gus Malzahn calling the plays? Gene Chizik will double his career win total. By October.

1. Game of next week?

I know that the bottom of the ACC should be fired now. But you know what? It's kind of a dull week next week. I know Bama-Arkansas will be fun. And the Houston for BCS meme will get rolling if Case Keenum can outduel Taylor Potts. But South Florida lost Matt Groethe for the year (Ewing theory?) as they play Florida State. So you know what? It's Miami Virginia Tech.

And if an upset happens? That's why it's called an upset.

Thursday, September 17, 2009

The Film Student Breakdown of Texas-Texas Tech.

You know me. I like movies. I also have this nascent idea that I'm going to write a movie someday. So, for my own personal practice. And because I think this will at least be interesting, if not funny. I will attempt to set a narrative for this game.

We shall call this game Guns Up. It will be the story of a plucky quarterback thrust into the spotlight against an evil empire. In this instance? Texas will be a lietmotif for...the onslaught of Republican anger? No. Texas Tech has that sort of boisterous energy playing fast and loose with the facts with a lesser amount of talent.

So then, what will the Longhorns represent? Yes! The Longhorns represent the rigid corporate structure. Their team is something like a factory, attempting to develop people for a professional career. On the other hand? You look at the Red Raiders and they represent a rugged individualism. Spread 'em and shred 'em right? Right.

And of course, we need a Protagonist for this. An antihero who doesn't seem to have a future at the next level. But you need someone with a real mental toughness and some wacky facial hair. So, obviously, the main character in guns up? Taylor Potts.

I mean, look at this photo. He has the mustache of an antihero. (H/T: EDSBS/link's at the photo)

The Nemesis for this job is the heir to the Longhorn Throne. Will Muschamp. Now, I'm sure he's a gentleman and good to his family and friends in real life, but for my purposes, he beat Bryan Orakpo upside the head and shoulders for insolence and killed Blake Gideon's dog for costing Texas the National Championship game.

Because at present? He is the Diet Coke of evil.

The Mentor is as obvious as the fact that he is going to have to die to make this storyline work. He is a pirate loving, stupid powerful offensive mind, give you sound dating advice, and unafraid to make any powerful organization angry toward him because he knows man. He knows. He's a guru. He's a shaman. He's Charlie fuckin' Kelly. That's Mike Leach.

And as he told the Franchione, if you strike me down I will come back stronger than you can possibly imagine.

The Attractor? The survivng member of the Big 12 conference college of awesome from 2008. Colt McCoy. He's the front man for the corprate entity that wishes to enchroach on the state of play in college football, and he is the George Bush to Will Muschamp's Dick Cheney. Taylor Potts has to be the mustachoied Barack Obama.

(Come on. If it's a movie, it has to be stridently liberal.)

And look at this photo. That is the Democratic Vision of the average Republican. H-HYUCK!

And who is your Trickster? Often times in cinema, you have a mentor who also portrays the role of a trickster. And if someone who says “We’re going to treat (the next three games) all dramatically differently, and there will be all kinds of interesting little twists and nuances that we’ll do to each individual one to dignify it for its importance that exists in the overall scheme of the universe. There’ll be dramatic differences, and throughout the course of that deal, I’ll enjoy talking about it in length.” You know that the Mentor archetype is also a trickster. Mike Leach is your dual archetype. And he has to die.

All has to be lost in Guns Up. All has to be lost for our hero to be redeemed. So barring the tragic circumstances of a head coach dying before his time? This is going to have one of those endings nobody's going to understand. But Peter Travers is going to call it visually arresting.

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

A Fantasy Football Top 5 List Triad

I know I'll be late on one of these lists, but I'll bring your information that you need to help your team out. In terms of guys to target as well as guys to dump. From week 1 until I have no reason to do fantasy football references. I will make at least three top five lists.

Top 5 Players You Should Not Press The Panic Button On.

1) Steve Smith (WR-CAR)
--I know that Jake Delhomme has about seventeen forks in his back. But here's the thing? The Panthers have a chance to generate a good offense for the next two months. You get a panicky owner? And you can have him at a low value.

2) Jermichael Finley (TE-GB)
--All summer long, you've heard one thing about Finley. He's going to be the single greatest force in terms of seam-stretching Y-control. And then the regular season rolls around? One target. One grab. Six yards. But he does not have another a bad matchup until Week 11. Stay strong on your sleeper.

3) Marshawn Lynch (RB-Buf)
--Now everybody is talking about Fred Jackson, and his super inspirational story. And you know what? He's probably still rosterable as a handcuff. But here's the deal. Marshawn gets his yards and Marshawn gets his scores. And while he won't be getting the checkdown love? He's still a consistent force. It'll be a mistake to let him go cheap.

4) Willie Parker (RB-Pit)
--Stash him for a month. Because if he is healthy? He is going to make a run at six weeks of glory from Week 5 onward. If you wish to hedge your bets with a Mewelde Moore? I can bless that. But he's not done yet, and Rashard Mendenhall? He just might be.

5) Donnie Avery (WR-St.L)
--Donnie Avery is going to have a tremendous second half. I mean really. The worst match-up that the Rams have from Week 8 onward is at Chicago. I know there's the Bulger problem, but you know what? This team will jell. He will be on my buy low list at some point.

The Top 5 waiver wire pick-ups. Now.

1) Mark Sanchez (QB-NYJ)
--I've got a projection. There will be some story in November asking the question, have rookie quarterbacks turned the corner? The AFC East looks like a very strong division to throw on this season, and add in Tennessee, Tampa Bay, and potentially Atlanta (week 16 at Home) and you have a quarterback with the opportunity to prove himself as a worthy starter.

2) Raiders. Seriously.
--Louis Murphy is big and fast and nearly helped the Raiders shock the world. And until Chaz Schilens comes back from his foot injury, we have the Raiders #1 receiver. But with Chaz Schilens healthy? We've got a competent passing game. Who knew? And in terms of the running game? You cannot ignore the fact that Michael Bush punched it in.

3) Mark Clayton (WR-Bal)
--I know that Joe Flacco was freakish for week one. And I know that Derrick Mason is someone who's made of possession receiving prototyping. But here's the thing. Clayton is healthy. And while Joe Flacco's week one may have been his best? He'll have plenty of opportunity for good games.

4) Earl Bennett (WR-Chi)
--I've made mention of Earl Bennett before as a potential posession receiver with yards after catchability. He proved that right. If he's there, pick him up now. Pittsburgh can be thrown on.

5) The Redskins Defense.
Some of us didn't reach in the seventh round for Pittsburgh or Baltimore. Some of us waited until the next to last round to pick somebody up. But for the next 5 weeks? The Redskins have 4 match-ups of their next 5 where they rank 3rd, 5th, 1st, and 7th when compared to their opponent. Cut them before they play Philly and you're gold.

Top 5 Stash Plays

1) Matt Leinart (QB-Arz)
--Kind of obvious, but come on. I mean, come on. Arizona has a second half built for chucking the ball around the field. And if he sees the field? He's got a shot to be quite successful as well as a non-bust.

2) James Davis (RB-Cle)
--I know, the rumor was that he was so good Jamal Lewis was supposed to be cut. But he's got a great batch of run skills. And if you don't need a positional upgrade, he's worthwhile to hang on to. Truth be told.

3) Laurent Robinson (WR-St.L)--Now I know that some people have been all up in Laurent Robinson and his #1 targets this week. However? Like I said with Donnie Avery. It's a wino eating grapes pickup. Dude. You've got to wait.

4) Deon Butler (WR-Sea)
--He is currently a #3 receiver. And he is likely to stay as a #3 receiver if health permits. But if not? The Seahawks are going to throw on some suckers in the second half of the year. Nate Burleson goes down? Jump on this faster than a fat kid eating cake.

5) Jared Cook (TE-Ten)
--Because he's a man of supreme physical skill in an offense that throws a ridiculous amount to the tight end. What else is there?

Sunday, September 13, 2009


I've been the sort of guy who finds his way into complaining about the hobbies that I do. And there is a lot to hate about fantasy football as well as the NFL. And this was supposed to be a screed about how dumb I was to get into a league where Joe Flacco could have a 47 point day. Really.

But here's the thing. That was the perfect ending. Greg Jennings torching Nathan Vasher. Never mind the coors commercials. Never mind Charlie Sheen. Never mind Twitter blowing up with the Tequilan attention whorishness of Kanye West.

Life is good. Life. Is. Good.

Be back tomorrow, yeah? Yeah.

Saturday, September 12, 2009

The Seven Things I Learned About College Football this week.

I did this one last week. I looked smart at one point from it this week. But I'm going to give it another go.

7) If you live on the East Coast? Watch the Colonial Athletic Association.

Maryland had to escape in overtime to beat James Madison 38-35. If they didn't? It would have been the Colonial's third win against the ACC. As it is? Give it up for New Hampshire. They took down Ball State 23-16. That's the CAA's 4th win versus an upper level team. They may be designated at a lower level, but this conference is for real.

6) Conversely? The ACC is going to have a classically down year.

It took a late touchdown for Florida State to beat Jacksonville State. They were down 9-7 for the majority of the game. Add to that UNC needing a UConn mistake in the end zone leading to a safety and I'm honestly thinking that this conference won't deserve an automatic bid either. The way things are going, a Nebraska win next week in Blacksburg won't stun me.

Bonus round? Georgia Tech has to go to Miami next week. that will go a long way to eating the ACC. Because, see. Miami is going to win.

5) This year more than any, games won't be played on paper.

I know Houston-Oklahoma State was going to be a shootout, but even if people thought that Georgia and South Carolina would be decided by a blocked extra point, anyone who thought 41-37 as a final for that game would be mocked. And rightfully so.

4) I'm still going with Cal as the sleeper National Championship team.

Oregon can't stop anybody. And Matt Barkley is not awesome at hitting the trial by fire. Cal may trip itself up, but if anybody outside the Florida-Texas-USC phylum makes the National Championship game. My bet is on Cal.

3) Even if Oklahoma State isn't National Championship Caliber?

Dez Bryant is worthy of the #1 pick.

2) If I had to pick a Freshman Quarterback to win me one game?

Tate Forcier. Barkley was impressive, but Forcier has a little more swagger to his stride.

1) Next week is going to be a very scary scenario for big schools.

Another flat start next week, and Texas could get shot out by the magic mustache of Taylor Potts. Minnesota is a resillient team, and could very well keep Cal in a game. And Toledo? Dare I say it. Ohio State just got its heart broken. And Toledo is flying. And this is at a neutral site.



The Five Coaches who are most likely not last the year.

1) Al Groh, Virginia
2) Dan Hawkins, Colorado
3) George O' Leary, UCF
4) Mike Samford, UNLV
5) Ralph Fridgen, Maryland

And now, a dramatic reenactment of Toledo versus Colorado.

Toledo Coach Tim Beckman is the Blue Hag.

Colorado's illusions of being a National Power have been blowed up and Toledo was the Odin that did it.

Thursday, September 10, 2009

So, who's going to make the playoffs and who's going to win the Super Bowl?

I'll do this via the process of elimination. We have 32 teams, and we need to get down to 12. And then from 12 we need to get ourselves down to one. I'll keep this fast paced and conversational.

Out via the process of a complete mess.

We've never had an offseason where we have had three offensive coordinators get fired in the preseason. And as such? You can knock out Tampa Bay, Buffalo, and Kansas City from the proceedings. With the ham-fisted handling of the Jay Cutler and Brandon Marshall situations, Denver gets knocked out. And Oakland? Oakland is Oakland. Any year they aren't drafting in the top 10 is a surprise.

Out via the process of a partial mess.

With the insane behavior of Michael Crabtree and his tag team partner Eugene Parker? San Fransisco is out. The Hard Knocks curse + Andre Smith + The 6th round pick who once punched out a coach equals Cincinnati is out. Detroit will be better, but the copycat teams in the NFL? They do not bring as much success and off of an 0-16 record, the talent level doesn't skyrocket. Especially in the NFC North.

Out via strengthened schedules?

You can call the failings of Arizona as a by-product of a dual curse. (Madden and Super Bowl loser). And considering that surprise teams rarely have a good encore season? You can use that to knock out Miami and Atlanta. And I don't think we're going to see Baltimore and Tennessee make return trips.

Out because their quarterback is an old man/useless/both?

Minnesota. There are two teams with a real buzz to them, and neither one of them has a 40 year old man with a torn bicep. Houston? Matt Schaub is someone who can only stay upright for 10 to 12 games. And with Rex Grossman as your back-up? It's bad mojo. St. Louis is out because it's Marc Bulger as their starter and nobody rightfully believes in Kyle Boller. And Carolina has a worse defense to go with Jake Delhomme. And despite me stupidly thinking that they could actually make a deep run, I can't pull the trigger on Cleveland. And Jason Campbell, I like him, but he's in the wrong situation to make his way in the world, so goodbye Washington.

Just missing the playoffs?

Dallas. Because fuck them.

So here's our 12 playoff teams.

1. Pittsburgh
2. Indianapolis
3. San Diego
4. New England
5. Jacksonville
6. NY Jets

1. New York Giants
2. Green Bay
3. New Orleans
4. Seattle
5. Chicago
6. Philadelphia

Wild Card Weekend?
New England beats the Jets, on account of them putting up a number that the Jets can't match.
San Diego beats Jacksonville, on account of them being able to throw the ball.

New Orleans beats Philadelphia in the game of the weekend.
Chicago beats Seattle. Matt Forte comes up strong.

Divisional Playoffs?
Indianapolis beats New England. Bob Sanders is healthy. It decides things.
San Diego beats Pittsburgh. Because Jesus owes Phillip Rivers.

The Giants beat Chicago in the Lee Marvin game of the divisional round.
Green Bay beats New Orelans in the 1980's WAC game in the second round. 45-31. Yeah.

Championship Game
Indianapolis beats San Diego.
And...here we go. Green Bay wins because the way Eli Manning won the Super Bowl is because he played the five greatest weeks of his life to get there and then the defense took over. The Giants defense isn't as good. And the Packers have more offensive weapons. Is not a homer pick.

Super Bowl
Green Bay 35
Indianapolis 24

Though the buzz on the Packers makes me wince a little. I am excited.

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

So you know how it seemed odd that Oregon suspended Blount for the year?

Especially when you realize that Byron Hout got "internal punishment?" Well, E.J. Prince broke out something interesting on twitter. What, exactly, did he say, well...

@iamcutdacheck: Just talked to Jamere Holland (from Oregon WR) said that L. Blount socked dude from Boise State cuz he called him a nigger

So you have a University that has a talented but troubled running back, who has a bad game. And you've got some cocky dude in the doucheband saying the one thing you're not supposed to say. Was his action justified? No. But was it understandable?

Yeah. But Oregon completely overreacted in response. It's submarining a first round talent's future to end his senior season like that. And especially considering that on Sportsmanship week, some dumbass from Idaho decides to rub it in. And nothing happens.

I always liked Boise State. But this sort of thing? Indefensible on all sides.


Don't remember the DreamCast? I do. It had the 2k sports series. And the game with the taxi.

Okay, just watch the commercial.

And an excuse for Ulala cosplay. Space Channel 5 was an awesome rhythm game. Right?

Heady times from a decade ago, yeah?

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

The Cadillac Williams Comeback.

Here's why fantasy football can fuck with your head. And this is why if you aren't involved, you should not get in on this.

Meet Carnell Williams. The kids call him Cadillac. To me? He is fuckface.

It's nothing personal. Really. But in my darker days of fantasy football addiction? He was the man whom doomed me to a season of losing 45-41. This was before he tore his patella tendon. Again.

But then he came back. And he doomed another fantasy team. This was before he herniated his disk. And there's a mess. He's brought doom to fantasy teams, as well as the Buccaneers, at least when he was healthy and active. So yeah, you wish that he would go away.

At least I would.

But anyway. You have captain solid in Earnest Graham, a dude that I like as an unsexy goal-line guy. You have Derrick Ward. He's a skilled runner, when healthy. And you have the albatross.

So who's going to start? Obviously, it's the albatross. Because Raheem Morris is a dumbass. Tampa's going to fail. And it will be Epic.


Sunday, September 6, 2009

The Seven interesting facts about today in College Football...

I know, I'm rocking you with lists. But I do this because I'm trying to rehab my creative juices and at least attempt to masturbate the text down the page. And as today was most definitely an interesting part of college football, we'll discuss what happened and what may yet happen.

7) As bad as the ACC's day was? The Big Ten's day could have been worse.

I know. Not much can beat the CAA proving that its best is at least as good as the ACC's middle of the pack. But here's what the Big Ten nearly had happen.

Iowa had to have two field goals blocked in the final seconds to beat Northern Iowa.
Minnesota nearly lost to Syracuse. In overtime, no less.
Ohio State had to stop a two point conversion to beat Navy.
And Wisconsin had to make a big stop to keep from having Northern Illinois come all the way back from a 28-6 defecit.

Next week? Next week could be really bad for your would be Midwestern heroes.

6) BYU could pose a real problem.

With the upset over Oklahoma? They have three tough games. All three are in Provo. I say if you beat Oklahoma, Florida State, TCU and Utah. You deserve a National Championship game.

5) USC won't be up for Cal.

But Cal has to win in Autzen to get to USC. Cal destroyed the team that beat them last September. SC has to deal with both Washington teams. The game's in Berkley. If anyone's running the table in the Pac-10? It's not going to be USC.

4) Landry Jones looks like a child molestor.

3) The SEC is as I would expect.

Florida and Alabama are the upper echelon. Arkansas, Georgia, LSU, Ole Miss, and Tennessee are the solid second tier. Everybody else inspires nothing.

2) Don't sleep on Houston next week.

They have a superpowered offense and can go toe to toe with anybody. Oklahoma State just beat a Top 10 team. It's a shootout definitely, but don't be surprised if the Cougars spring a trap. It looks to be that sort of a year.

1) This is going to be a mess, much like 2007.

And that's gonna be fun.

The Ten Most...The Ten Interesting Cut Day Moves.

Like incidents in congress or picks on Day 2 of an NFL Draft, cut day promises something interesting and delivers little more than a list post among the interested. So I'll tell you this. Ten moves intrigued me. I will list them accordingly.

10) Tyrell Sutton and Kregg Lumpkin RB Green Bay (In what seemed to be a heated competition, and one where there was a 2nd round draft choice from 2007 who came up lame, the Packers kept him and didn't keep 4 runners.)
9) Tony Pashos RT Jacksonville (Lost his stride with the rookie tackle infusion, can still play.)
8) Cedric Peerman RB Baltimore (He was the stealthy sleeper pick of choice by most draft wonks going into the season. Just landed on the wrong team to get that opportunity.)
7) Anthony Smith S Green Bay (A veteran who had a solid camp on a team with some injuries in the secondary. Just surprised me tis all.)
6) Ronald Curry WR St. Louis (The most star-crossed athlete from the late-90's until know. A tougher than leather solid veteran. Baltimore would love him.)
5) Brian Brohm QB Green Bay (Not to belabor the point, but in two years he goes from a future #1 pick to unemployed.)
4) Bernard Pollard SS Kansas City (The Tom Brady Ligament assassin is actually quite good in the special teams as well as on the blitz. And it's not often that you just out and out cut a starter.)
3) Jeff Garcia QB Oakland (He's still a solid professional who can be a worthy stopgap for any team that's missing a starter for four to six weeks.)
2) Jamal Lewis doesn't get cut (Because at the point that they decided that they were going to keep Lewis, they knew about someone with more tread on the tires who just came free.
1) Dominic Rhodes RB Buffalo (Any team that's looking for a solid runner who can take the onus off of the #1 can get themselves a veteran runner for little more than a song.)

Saturday, September 5, 2009

I've never been much for patting myself on the back.

But today? I look back at this thread. This was my most controversial take in the three year history of my blog. I was severe in my dislike toward this selection. And I actually had some Louisville fans come to Brohm's defense. I miss that.

But anyway, I make mention of this post because today the Packers have released Brian Brohm. Less than 18 months after they traded to get this pick, he's gone. He was so bad, that they would rather go with a back-up quarterback who has no clue about the system and a guy with a seperated shoulder as back-ups then Brian Brohm.

Am I gloating? Yes I am. But I called this. I am the champion my friend.



Friday, September 4, 2009

Ten Things that confuse me...

I know, I know. I don't have my energies focused, and I apologize. I'm going to do a mini-rant of several things that baffle me. So here we go.

10) Why are we firing offensive coordinators right before the season?

I mean really. We're right before the season starts, and three teams have found a way to fire their offensive coordinator. And you know what? That's brilliant. You have two teams who couldn't bring together a new offense without lasting the preseason. Cripes, alfridey get a new offense.

9) The Bucks have failed the offseason.

You have two players under 25 with talent and intrigue who are restricted free agents? You make moves to try and get under the cap. And you don't keep either. Because of Scott Skiles. Awesome.

8) LaGarrette Blount.

That Boise State game was odd. If this was the NFL? Chip Kelly would be on the hot seat. No other top 25 team will ever come into Boise. But you're taking away the man's right to a future with a season-long suspension. You have guys who swing helmets who get four game suspensions. So yeah. Nuts to that.

7) Could Jonathan Crompton have been the problem?

Bowling Green put up numbers Tennessee could have only dreamed about last year. 31 points. I mean, wow.

6) Maybe I was wrong about Temple being this year's Buffalo.

Though Villanova is stealthy in the One dubs because it plays in the same division in Richmond. Good looking out, money.

5) But this was awesome.


4) Oh Michigan...

When naming a true Freshman starter is a relief, you're an irrelevant joke. And I love you for it.

*e-hugs Rich Rodriguez*

3) The Cleveland Browns are comedy gold.

Rumors of Jamal Lewis getting cut. Still no official starting QB. If it wasn't for seven other teams being a mess? This would be awesome.

2) The seven other teams that are a mess?

Buffalo, Kansas City, Tampa Bay, Denver, Oakland, Detroit, and Philadelphia. I may be reaching on Philly, but there are cracks in the facade.

1) The Brewers need to find a way to flip Fielder this off-season.

Sorry about my damn luck, because Fielder is awesome, but they can't live on a diet of Looper and Suppan. They need talent. Or at the very least the bargain guys who came up big at one point.


Thursday, September 3, 2009

Sympathy for the Diamond...

It's a BLB Post. It's about 400 words of wistful about pitchers who get packaged together and how it brings doom. DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!

Okay. Just shoulder injuries.

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

A new reason to love Akron?

J.D. Brookhart's hat! That is fresh to flipping death!

H/T: Smart Football

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

As I am a blogger...

You know the stereotype. I'm a friendless virgin living in my mom's basement. But you know what? I want a chance to change that. I'm out of my Mom's Basement! And I'm looking for someone who enjoys a voluminous knowledge of sports and someone who could use a better narrative.

The candidate? Lynn Jenkins! The Congressional Representative from Kansas' 2nd District! She's a woman looking for a great white hope! And I ask you, blogger Nation! Do I have a shot?

Watch the video...

What say you? Do I have a chance?

Jarvis Vanardo.

I know I may crack wise on the state of the Starkville Junior Varsity Football team on several occasions, but that's only because it's easy and fun. I'm actually a fan of the basketball team. Or more specifically, Jarvis Vanardo. He's got a name that allows me to use my game show voice.

And his shotblocks are sweet, but that's another story.

But you don't want to hear these things about him. He's in the news because got sick and fell during a workout. And while the coaching staff says he's just fine? I was scared there for a moment. After all, how many kids lost time in college because of a hack doctor at the medical center.

But he's got good medical support. And he should be back. And the greatest front line money can buy will be ready for the greatest backcourt money could buy. SEC Basketball! It's fantastic! Until the wins get forefeited.